Arachnaphobia? Don't Know Her...Anymore

The other day, as I was playing a game with a friend, a salesguy knocked on the door. He was here to sell his service as pest control, getting rid of "black ants and spiders" and some rats if we had any. He was already doing work for a neighbor, so he said he could see his services that day for a cheap price.

I was busy so I said no thanks, and he left. I would have forgotten about the whole simple interaction except for one word: spiders.

I used to be very scared of spiders. I have memories of crashing my bike into a tree because I saw a daddy-long-leg on the handle as I was riding it, and freaking out plus screaming when I was in gym in high school when I saw a spider crawl through my hair. Heck, if I saw a spider in my room I'd kill it right away, my heartbeat all sped up like I was looking Death in the face.

My dad didn't approve. He said when he was a kid he played with spiders. He was the one who tried to keep the spider alive, who would carry it to freedom outside. He insisted they were harmless.

My mom and I would just looked at him like he was crazy when he said these things.

Boy howdy do I hate to admit he as right.

In undergrad and graduate college, I was hearing some things about spiders. Like, how they couldn't actually bite humans, or how their bite isn't bad, or how they were calm and pretty much more freaked out about the giant human than we are of the tiny arachnid. The people that were saying these things were smart, educated, and patient. One of them was studying to have the same master's in science writing as I, so they were particularly good at explaining to someone who absolutely feared the non-insects, even if I loved Spiderman.

Then I took the plunge and went on the subreddit r/spiders. I joined the subreddit, so I'd see posts come up on my home page. Underneath all these pictures of arachnids with hairy legs, big scary eyes, and pedipalps and injectors and scary looks...were comments on how calm and patient they were, how friendly and pretty. How they had good temperaments. The spiders even got an endearing nickname: "spood".

I read the comments and asked some questions. Exposed myself some more to spider pictures and videos. When I was visiting my sister in Beverly, MA, I went out to see her garden spiders everyday. I didn't touch them, but I knew they were there. I spoke to them. And they chase me, or try to bite me. They just didn't seem to care.

Heck, after viewing enough jumping spiders on the subreddit and doing a bit of research, I found they were quite intelligent and not-at-all harmful to us. They can even be kept as pets, if you didn't want something cuddly and huggable.

When I saw a crab spider in my backyard while I was trying to take a nap, I looked up how they were as well. Friendly little things, always identifiable by their longer forelegs and shorter back legs, like a crab. Not harmful to us.

My fear was running so thin that when a spider came into my house, I could actually carry it back outside without freaking out. I could boop a spider on its web in some vines.

And not only was I reading that these spiders are friendly - as in, will not bite unless really, really threatened - but they were very helpful as well. Nature's pest control. One thing you actually want taking up space in your home.

So when the pest control guy said he was there to get rid of ants and spiders, I wondered why he had to be there in the first place. The spiders would deal with the ants. They'd deal with all kinds of insects. And all we had to do was not freak out and kill the spider.

Entomologists know what I'm talking about. Farmers do as well, I think. People who garden, people who spend time outside. And knowing that, it seems like not enough people do go outside to see the work that the spiders do. To see that they are not foes that we should be warding against, but allies to - if not welcome - come to tolerate.

I'll still freak out if I saw a big spider in my room. But I ain't killing it, or will I try to. If anything, it owes me rent.